Soilman

This is the sum total of my gherkin crop for 2008.

It’s deeply, deeply shitty. And wretchedly unfair. I did everything right, but the weather crapped on me.

I’ve just got back from a short trip to Russia, where the sun was shining and the temperature was 25C. Cloudless skies, floating blossom, the lazy buzzing of bees, etc etc.

Then I get back to yet more British floods. I find myself questioning, not for the first time, the sanity of my forebears.

After all, these are the people who rowed across the English Channel in approx 4000 BC and decided to stay.

They must have arrived in July, during the only hot summer of the last seven millennia.